A couple friends of mine recently had their second adorable little child and named it Ben, which I learned was short for Benton, which is fortunately not the same as “Bentley,” which is the most overused car-model-as-baby-name since Mercedes. Though I was dismayed at the fact that they had not followed through on a promise to name the child after Yangervis Solarte, it did jog my mind on what a huge potential car model names have as baby names. I’m not talking Lincoln, Lexus or Royce (though there are a disturbing number of kids named Chevy and Ram), but the really obscure names – the gems – which are the best for your child?
12 Le Car
Possibly the ultimate name for the child of an automotive enthusiast, naming your kid “The Car” has just the right amount of French pretension while remaining grounded in the fact that Le Car was Renault’s entry level hatchback. What will definitely be clear is either your love for cars or your hatred for your child.
When Jensen chose this name for their sleek long coupe, I can just imagine the blokes sitting around the conference room table reciting “Interceptor” in aggressive, but hushed tones, extolling its implied sportiness and militaristic manliness. I can also imagine parents doing the same thing. Well, at least one of the parents. Interceptor Smith.
Both referencing an obscure 1950s coupe produced by Muntz and a Cowboy Bebop character get you two checkmarks with Jet. While the car only produced around 400 samples and came with a big American V8, you had better hope your child lays off the Ho-hos if it wants to live down a name like this.
Ford’s 1970s compact “import fighter” succeeded the massive Ford Falcon (also an excellent baby name) and copied enough of the Mustang’s style to be attractive, while featuring a smaller inline-six engine that meant it was more economical as well. While the Mustang is the seminal Ford coupe, the Maverick is also deserving of some love, perhaps making this a great name for that awkward middle child. Just make sure he doesn’t make friends with anyone named Goose.
While Aston has certainly been growing in popularity as a name for its subtle automotive reference while still very much being an actual name someone might want to be called, we’re here to throw convention out the window and go for the jugular with Vanquish. Just imagine your child walking into a job interview and introducing themselves as Vanquish Jones. They might as well just hand over the keys to the vault now.
7 Homy Super Long
For the parents who believe in self-fulfilling prophecies and harbor a secret desire to have their children become adult film actors, Nissan has come up with a great boy’s name for you! Being the name of a small (but long!) camper van, the name may not evoke as many stirring emotions as the next name on this list, it certainly prompts some imagery.
This is a name with so much heritage it ought to be limited to use by Italians only. Practically inseparable from Ferrari, Testarossa is a great boy’s name, but I’d steer clear from using it with girls unless you want to give the impression your child is fast, unreliable and that everyone wants to ride. You’re just an awful parent at that point.
Pontiac’s “Screaming Chicken” holds a place in many enthusiasts’ hearts, but not on many birth certificates and I can’t imagine why. With both powerful imagery of flames and birds of prey, not to mention snarling V8s and Burt Reynolds, who could possibly be unhappy with such a name? Kids are ungrateful.
I will grant that most new parents probably grew up around the time of the last Buick Roadmaster, a behemoth of a wagon that was slow, handled terribly and did little to live up to the stylish reputation of the roadster of the 1940s, but talk about a great name. Your kid was born to drive with a car nut as a parent and, assuming you don’t completely fail as a parent, they will love driving and aspire to become what their name already implies.
3 Mysterious Utility Wizard
Yes, it’s a long name, and yes, it’s the name of a full-size Isuzu SUV, but you could ensure that your child is the most fascinating person in his or her kindergarten class. They will instantly get a reputation as the most useful, magical individual around, but who no one quite knows enough about, thereby encompassing a lot of the other names on this list in one fell swoop.
2 Disco Volante
You really get it all with this name, which comes from an Alfa Romeo sports roadster; Italian style, 70s music reference and a name that means “flying saucer,” giving it a slightly cosmic essence. It just rolls off the tongue beautifully and I can imagine would look swell on business cards for a CEO who partakes in some casual space travel. Doesn’t Disco Volante Bezos sound better than “Jeff?”
1 Space Ranger
Going all in on the astronaut motif, Space Ranger, the name of a Rickman Range Rover knock-off, takes your child’s name to infinity and beyond. Sure “Buzz” was the first man to walk on the moon, there’s plenty of heritage there – but was he truly a Space Ranger? Did he travel the galaxy rounding up space pirates and bringing them to justice? Basically, you’re signing your kid up to be the most righteous badass of the future by adorning them with such a name. Get at it.
Honorable mentions go to Viper, Countach and Bongo Brawny, all of which sound fantastic but were simply outdone by others on this list or sounded too much like characters from American Gladiator. What did we miss? Have you named your child Cavalier and grown to (rightfully) regret it? Tell us in the comments